Oh Bother
by Miranda Pisani
Summary: Drabbles, Ficlets and One shots for random pairings and, if I'm bored, a single character. There are going to be characters from all generations and probably a few OCs if I go a little mad. Named so because I honestly can't think of a better name.
1. Falling or RoseScorpius

**Authors Note: Alright, here goes nothing. I'm Miranda and this is my first uploaded Fic, but I've been writing FanFiction for years, and just writing for as long as I can remember. This is just going to be a collection of Drabbles, Ficlets and One shots for random pairings and, if I'm bored, a single character. There are going to be characters from all generations and plenty of Mew and Mor's Weird pairings, because they are epic. There is going to be fluff, unrequited, cousincest, slash, het, femmeslash, crack and, hell just about anything. Probably no pure incest, excluding perhaps some Blackcest, because, in the words of Gamma Orionis: ****Toujours Pur - French for "Inbred, but sexy". **  


**First up we have Rose/Scorpius with implied Albus/Scorpius, Enjoy.**

* * *

**Falling**

Falling, Rose Weasley loved the feeling, the feeling of her stomach trying to swap places with her lungs, of her heart trying to jump up her throat. It was almost like flying she decided, after all was flying not throwing yourself at the ground and missing? And Rose had missed the ground, or at least she hadn't gotten hurt, because Scorpius felt the same way, or so he said. And Rose was too smitten to see through his lies, to see through him. She was blind to how close Albus and Scorpius were, to how Scorp's eyes were always on her cousin even when he was with Rose. And by the time she put two and two together, she was falling, with no way to stop herself from hitting the ground.

* * *

**Yes, that was a Hitchiker's Guide reference. ****If for some reason you feel the need to request a pairing please do so and if you're bored, hit me with a prompt. Reviews are welcome, be honest, I'm here to work on my writing. **


	2. Innocence or AlbusScorpius

**AN: And here is the second Drabble-thing, this one is Albus/Scorpius with background Scorpius/Rose, it is connected to Falling. Please excuse the swear and Enjoy!**

* * *

**Innocence**

"Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?" It was such a silly question, especially since it was being asked as the two boys lay mostly naked on the bed in Albus' apartment after a bout of fuckery, but this question was so Albus, and it made Scorpius grin. Al still had this innocence about him, no innocence wasn't the right word, innocent people didn't sneak around with people like Scorpius behind their cousin's backs. He was silly? No, he was brilliant. Maybe he was naive? No that's not quite right either. He was ... simple, he saw things the way no one else did, and that was why Scorpius loved him. Scorpius rolled back onto Albus and replied "I don't know love, but if you don't mind I'm about to enjoy some more adultery", Al smiled and pulled the blond boy in for another kiss. Yes, there was definitely nothing innocent going on here.

* * *

**Reviews would be lovely and pairing requests are welcome, as are prompts.**


	3. Drowning or AstoriaRose

**AN: Alright, here is the third, Astoria/Rose, one of Mew and Mor's Weird Pairings. Consider it a follow up of sorts to Falling and Innocence, not all of these are going to be connected. Enjoy.**

* * *

**Drowning**

You hate falling, you're terrified of it. Though to be honest its not the falling that scares you but whatever awaits you at the bottom of the drop, with Scorpius it had been cement and the collision had left you broken, broken in such a way that you thought you would never be whole again. You thought that the Malfoys would want nothing to do with you after you threw your engagement ring into Scorpius' face, but you were wrong. Astoria had appeared at your door and lent you her shoulder to cry on, she had comforted you. She had helped piece you back together, she became your closest friend. And then you were falling again, but you didn't recognize the signs. You didn't want to recognize the signs, you were too scared. But with Astoria there was water at the bottom of the drop, and soon you were drowning with no chance of swimming back to the surface. These feelings hit you hard and fast without warning. You can't go near the older witch without being drowned in her. Face it Rose, you have fallen in love with your former boyfriends mother. Her scent surrounds you, her warmth pulls you in, those ice blue eyes haunt you, and those red lips beg to be kissed. Perhaps that was why you did what you did when, on a frozen winter morning Astoria showed up at your door with coffee. You sat down and chatted, talking about everything and nothing. One moment you had been treading water, paying attention to your friend and then you were drowning again, unable to do anything but stare at the witch beside you. "Rose? Are you all right?" She asked, her face the picture of concern. And then you had simply leaned in and kissed her, you had no idea why, your only explanation was that you had gone temporarily insane. But no matter how hard you try Rose, you can't explain why she kissed you back.

* * *

**Reviews, requests and prompts welcome**


	4. Lies or LavenderDaphne

**AN: And her we have the fourth, another M&MWP Daphne/Lavender. From Lav's POV, post-war obviously, it's an argument with herself at Daphne's wedding.**

* * *

**Lies**

**Why are you here?**  
I was invited.  
**That's a lie Lavender and you know it.**  
I'm here because she's my friend.  
**With all these lies you could have been a Slytherin, you would be one step closer to her after all.**  
Shut up!  
**So you are lying to yourself too?**  
No I'm not! Am I?  
**If can't admit to yourself why you're really here you are.**  
Why am I here?  
**You tell me and then we'll both know.**  
I'm here because ...  
**Yes?**  
Because I'm hoping she'll choose me instead of him.  
**And why is that?**  
I'm in love with her.  
**And so you finally admit it to yourself. Took you long enough**. **Too long.**  
She ... she can't be saying those vows!  
**Ah, but she is Lavender. You're too late, too late to save the princess from the  
dragon. Some Gryffindor you are!  
**No ...**  
Yes ...  
**I can't do this ...**  
Of course you can't, it's not like you are supposed to be brave, oh no, nothing like that.  
**I ... bravery is overrated anyway.**  
What are you doing Lavender?  
**Running, because maybe if I run far enough away I can forget the image of her saying "I do" to that ... man.**  
You will never forget it Lavender, it will haunt your nightmares. Your Daphne, marrying some idiotic pureblood all because you were too scared to tell her how you feel.  
**Shut up, just shut up!  
**You do realize you are talking to yourself her right? Well I always knew you were insane.**  
Oh, go to hell!  
**That will never happen Lavender, because I am as much a part of you as she was, as she always will be, The Slytherin Ice Queen.**

* * *

**Alright, now I am going to take a leaf out of another writers book: Review or you will be forced to watch Umbridge give Voldemort a lapdance while Hagrid and Dobby shag in the background, you have been warned!**


	5. Surprise or DominiqueMolly II

**AN: Alright, I'm bored so you lot get a second drabble thing tonight. Yet another M&MWP, this time it's Dominique and Molly II, which means that it's our first instance of cousincest. Enjoy.**

* * *

**Surprise**

The family had been utterly flabbergasted when they found out. They would have expected this sort of thing from Lily or Roxanne, and Dom had always been unpredictable, but Molly? She was the sensible one of the family, prefect and later Head Girl complete and utter opposite of Dom, the girl with Attention Deficit - ooh shiny, the girl who made no sense at all. They were nothing alike and yet there they stood, hands intertwined , shoulder to shoulder waiting for the outburst, Hugo had walked in on them in the garden behind the Burrow and freaked, screamed and the entire family had come running and then stopped in their tracks, they had gone from a peaceful family Christmas party to ... this. Dom had sworn and untangled herself from Molly, refusing to let go of her hand and then they had braced themselves for the storm. You are cousins! They would scream, You are both girls! This is insane! There were many other things they would shout in protest, because to them this was wrong. But to Dominique and Molly nothing had ever felt more right. Because when they were together Molly wasn't the uptight, obsessive compulsive, strict Head Girl and Dom wasn't the insane, hyperactive spaz, they were just ... perfect. And so ,as the family began to scream, Molly just pulled Dom in for another kiss, effectively cutting off their rant. Dom pulled away smiling at Molly before turning to her family and saying simply "We don't care", before apparating herself and Molly away. Percy promptly fainted.

* * *

**Review or I'll ... I'll write a Giant Squid fic! Seriously, even if it's just to tell me how much this series sucks in the most colorful way you can think of I'll appreciate the review.**


	6. Futile or JustinPansy

**A/N: Hello people, sorry for the lack of updates recently, I had much Drama down here in the middle of nowhere. Anyway, this was a request from a mate of mine and for once it's not femslash! -shock and horror- It's Justin Flinch-Fletchley and Pansy Parkinson. Enjoy and review damn you!  
**

* * *

**Futile**

Justin Finch-Fletchley sat in the back of the Transfiguration class, attempting to pay attention to the lesson and failing horribly. His gaze kept straying to a certain black-haired Slytherin in the front row, watching the way she was playing with her quill, she wasn't paying attention either. Susan realized who he was watching and rolled her eyes, sincerely hoping that he would get over this crush soon, but it was futile Justin had had this "thing" for Parkinson since at least third year, it was now sixth and the idiot still hadn't given up. He was setting himself up for failure, all his friends knew it and they had told him so, but he had brushed off their warnings. Hannah had by now noticed Justin's lack of attention, sighed and furiously waved her hand in front of his face to bring him back to reality. Justin jumped and swore at the movement, dragging Ernie's attention to him. Ernie surveyed the scene with severe disinterest before smacking the back of Justin's head. Sadly, McGonagall noticed and began screaming at them, every Slytherin in the room turned to them, smirking, Pansy's the largest of all. She leaned over and whispered something in Zabini's ear and both collapsed in fits of silent giggles. As McGonagall finished her rant, Justin watched Pansy as she laughed and almost smiled, not realizing the joke they had shared was about him, Leanne and Zacharias noticed though and sent identical death glares at Pansy. The glares made Pansy laugh even harder. The bell rang and everyone packed up to leave, Pansy wiping tears of mirth off her cheeks. Justin and Pansy reached the door at the same moment; Justin smiled and took a step back, allowing Pansy to go through first. Pansy sneered at him and hissed under her breath "What are you smiling at, mudblood?" Every Hufflepuff who heard the statement reeled; Susan even attempted to tackle Pansy, Megan having to hold her back to prevent an incident. Pansy smirked at the anger on the Hufflepuff's faces before turning on her heel and walking away. She never saw the way Justin's face fell, she would never know that it took him a full week to smile properly again. She would never know, because she was Pansy Parkinson and he was just a mudblood.

* * *

**Megan would be Megan Jones said by queen Rowling to be a Hufflepuff in Harry's year, Leanne is the friend of Katie Bell's who was there during the necklace incident and is also said to be a Hufflepuff in Harry's year. You'll probably recognize Ernie MacMillan, Zacharias Smith, Hannah Abbot, Susan Bones and Blaise Zabini. Thanks for reading.  
**


	7. Scream or ParvatiDean

**A/N: Yeah, second one today, I'm bored so expect a few more. Set during HBP we have Parvati/Dean, Dean/Ginny and Lavender/Ron. Hopefully it's okay.  
**

* * *

**Scream**

You sit in the common room, for once actually attempting your homework. You hear a giggle and glance up only to be met by the sight of Lavender attempting to eat Ron's face, or at least that's what it looks like from here. You scowl, your best friend was acting like an idiot, and your only consolation was that Potter was suffering as badly as you were. Nearby Dean has also noticed and is miming throwing up into the fire. You laugh, it's the first time in a while that you've had a genuine reason to, but Dean has always been able to do that to you. He shoots you a grin which you return, your stomach doing flips. You look back at your work blushing, you are certain you were staring again. You curse at your stupidity, he is dating Ginny Weasley, you don't even have a chance. But, because you are Parvati you just keep on foolishly loving the sod. You attempt to continue with your homework, you realize its Divination and smile; it's your favorite subject. Then your face falls, no, it's Lavender and your favorite subject. You involuntarily glance at your best friend again, she doesn't even notice you. You bite your lip and look away; your gaze falls on Dean again. Ginny walks through the door, grins at Dean and sits next to him, she notices your stare and smiles at you and you manage a half smile back and glance away. You can't quite bring yourself to hate her, she was a decent kid. Your gaze wanders around the room and somehow finds its way back to Ron and Lavender, they're snogging yet again and you're sick of it. You return your attention to your homework, but your vision swims. You growl and give up, crumpling your homework into a ball and hurling it towards the bin, it misses and hits Seamus on the back of the head, but you don't care. You storm up the stairs to your thankfully empty dormitory, slam the door, collapse on your bed and scream.

* * *

**Not much to say here except a thanks to a good mate of mine, I'm still writing thanks to your kind words, reassuring me that I can actually write. I shall threaten you lot again: Review or I will sic the Blast-Ended Skrewts on you!  
**


End file.
